Yesterday, after a year and half without beef, chicken or pork, I ate a cheeseburger for lunch. I have been craving meat for a really long time. I tried to convince myself that I really didn't need meat. No matter what I ate, the cravings did not go away. Finally, yesterday, I realized what was going on with me. Rewind a year and a half....
I decided to give up meat after pondering it for a couple of weeks. I convinced myself that it was for "health" reasons. I knew a few vegetarians, oddly enough, they were all very thin. Hmmmm. That makes ya wonder doesn't it. So, now lets fast forward back to a couple of months ago. I was reading the IE book and they mentioned that some people give up meat to lose weight under the umbrella of it being for health reasons. I had no idea that the book meant me. Until yesterday. The thought had crossed my mind on a number of occasions but I blew off those thoughts because I would have never been that desperate to lose weight. Or would I?
Yesterday, when I bit into that cheeseburger, I realized that I was, in fact, that desperate to lose weight. I can't describe the sense of relief that my body felt. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from me, like I was done pretending. I felt enlightened; I was just ignoring what my body was telling me for "health" reasons. I had been trying to figure out for the past few weeks what forbidden food I had been forgetting about. Who would have thought, it was cheeseburgers?
Today, I feel like my list of forbidden foods is complete; slowly but surely I worked my way through it. I feel free to eat whatever in the h*ll I want.
Including the pepperoni and sausage pizza I had for dinner.
10 comments:
Christie, I'm very happy for you. I am very suspect of the whole giving up meat for health reasons thing. It seems a bit extreme when you think about it. Sure one can argue that it isn't the healthiest thing to eat for a variety of reasons, but I think it's going a bit too far to completely eliminate it for that reason alone. And I say this as someone who doesn't eat meat except for the occasional seafood. But for me it has nothing to do with health reasons.
Thanks, Tree Lover. It is a hard thing to accept that I have been living in denial for so long. But I am free now!
I'm so pleased to see that you're uncovering those sneaky diet thoughts - it's amazing where they hide!
This part "I had no idea that the book meant me" reminds me of myself when I first started IE - still desperate to lose weight and pretending I wasn't. I read so many times on the forum about people stuck in that trap, but I never counted myself as one of them. When I finally realised that's what I'd been doing, I felt so relieved too.
Enjoy your cheeseburgers!!
Wow what a big revelation. Hope you really enjoyed that cheeseburger and the freedom it represented.
What a wonderful job of listening to your body and doing what you know, intuitively, is right! I can only imagine how wonderful that burger must have tasted to you! Keep up the great work!
As a former vegetarian, I really enjoyed your post. My reasons were not health reasons, at least at first- they were really esthetic and also a bit of "rebel"- I left home for college and immediately became vegetarian. I lapsed occasionally, when dining out, but was pretty much totally veg (but not vegan) for about 13 years. Interestingly enough, I gained - and lost- weight over that time, so vegetarianism was not a weight loss strategy for me. Nevertheless, after so many years, meat did become somewhat "forbidden" in my mind. When I tried to figure out why, I used "health reasons" for lack of anything better. Only after I started IE did I give myself permission to eat ANYTHING, including any meat. So, my point I guess is that vegetarianism makes for a lousy weight loss diet anyway.
Hell yeah!
:)
Listening...actually LISTENING to what your body wants (not what your mind wants) is an amazing tool. Cravings are not bad...they're just information telling us that there's something missing from our diets or our lives...I'm SO proud of you!
A cheeseburger could be the path to Nirvana. You rock, Christie.
I have been learning to deal with this as well, but for me, like Tree Lover, it isn't a health issue. For me it's more of an ethical issue. That being said, I have let small amounts of dairy and eggs back into my life, and meat once in awhile since starting IE, because i found I craved it. I've discussed this on my blog a few times, but I am still struggling with it. Only time will tell.
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